Just Watch Me

I don’t know what has crawled up into my craw. I’m not mad. I’m determined.

I’m not good with patience but I think I have been backed into the proverbial corner both personally and work wise.

You don’t think I’m going to make the outsides match the insides. Just fucking watch me.
You don’t think I’m going to stop being ms. stomp all over me. Just fucking watch me.
You don’t think I’m going to be successful and get my self out of this situation. Just FUCKING watch me.

I let this shit happen. If I’m mad at anyone it’s myself. Yah I let my ass get this size. Sure there are genetics but you don’t think in two years time, I’m going to be a different person inside and out. Then just sit back and fucking watch, motherfuckers.

Sure my savings are squat and it’s been rough but that’s because I gave a fuck about other people and let them cut into profit line before myself. I sacrificed ME for them. Not going to happen any further. You think in two years time, I won’t have my savings back, plus be where I want to be financially, just try me motherfuckers.

I don’t need to make new friends. I don’t need to expand my circle and let new people lie and weasel and manipulate me. In fact, I don’t need to let old people come back into my life and do the same.

I have a tight, great circle of friends I trust more than anyone. I have family that are supportive and amazing. And I have me.

I’m first. What I want. How I want it. My needs.
Selfish, you bet.
It’s my new sieve through which all things are going through.

2 thoughts on “Just Watch Me

  1. I am so glad you are finally seeing what all of us have know for years-YOU ARE TOTALLY WORTH IT-WHAT EVER THE PRICE. You are worth the money you charge for your work. You deserve to be taken seriously. You are awesome. You deserve to have your needs meet. You deserve to take care of you first and not sacrifice your soul. I am proud of you for standing up and saying here is the line I will no longer cross and neither can you.
    I am proud of you period. You are the best friend anyone can have ever.
    love you-m

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